YEAH! Rocket Raccoon!
I had a pseudo date. I hadn’t seen this girl in almost three months. We’d just texted for over a month, almost every day. She knows I am crushing a little on her.
So we finally see each other. And I enjoyed just chatting with her for over five hours.
But afterwards, she has texted me a lot less frequently. I believe she wanted me to do more. Hold her hand, kiss her, something.
By default, sure, I hold back. But in this case, it wasn’t out of fear or anxiousness. It was out of respect. I was trying to convey that I gave a shit.
Now I feel like I’m not being taken seriously. Potentially friend-zoned, in fact.
It’s a shame. Especially given how much affection I have built up for her. I’ve known her for over a year. I’ve crushed on her every day since the day I met her.
So on our first meet in a long time, finally one-on-one, it’s regrettable that she took my respectfulness as standoffishness, if that is indeed how she interpreted it.
The thought I’ve had every day since, in those moments I miss hearing from her, when I wish I could’ve given her just one kiss:
I felt foolish when our texting chemistry wasn’t quite the same as in-person…but it was hard for me to express myself when I was looking into THOSE eyes, looking at me, speaking from those lips, through that gorgeous smile, speaking words that matched my own feelings and opinions so closely, in that soothing voice. Of course I didn’t meet expectations, because I was taken aback at how you surpassed mine in every way imaginable.
If this world didn’t require us to play games to obtain anything worth having, I’d have told you exactly how I felt a month ago.
But for now, I just hope I haven’t lost my chances for trying to be a nice guy…
Happens a lot more than I’d like, really.